Well?!

It went well. If that’s what you’re asking, which I assume it is. The girls first day of preschool went well. Morning, actually. 9:15-12 noon. Beenie fought as hard as she could getting dressed in the morning, as I knew she would. Mimi made at least two costume changes as I knew she would. All predictable. Woke up 45 minutes before we were to leave, typical. Nobody had time or focus to eat brekky, of course, so I rustled up some half-eaten snack bowls from their backpack of snacks that go everywhere, put some soy milk in their sippy cups, gave ’em each a cookie I made the day before, and off we went. Made it in the front door, spouse came for the beginning and left as class began, and I sat outside the classroom for one hour or so after they started up, making sure to be available in case of emergency. There was none. In all the hullabaloo of getting out the door in the morning, I neglected to bring the bag with my driver’s license and other important items in it, so came home to retrieve it*. Got back to the school about forty minutes too early, so sat back down to await the end of class. The kids were on the way up the staircase from running around in the church basement which is also called the “gym”, the space where they run around and play if it is rainy or inclement outside, which Friday was. Beenie caught sight of me and came over and told me to come into class, so I told her to go in and I’d wait for her and Mimi outside till it was time to leave. Mimi saw me, too, came over and I told her the same thing. They both went back into their class with the other kids and the door shut behind them. Five minutes later an excessively loud and familiar scream emanated from the classroom, quickly followed by Miss Donna’s face, then Mimi’s red face. I scooped her up and we walked and I tried to talk her down. It was because she saw me that she got upset, that plus she was tired and probably overwhelmed by the whole morning. I can understand. The teacher had us come back into the room with Mimi after she calmed down and the teary little girl sat on my lap with me till the end of class. She was fine. Beenie was totally not freaked out, knew I would be back for her and them and was involved playing with some of the blocks. Then she was also very interested in some of the dress-up high heels and it was hard to get her out of the classroom when it was time to go.

Not bad for a first day! Neither napped when we got home, which I had hoped would happen. Though falling asleep during the day in the car is now the only way they will nap these days, so I will try to make sure things are lined up perfectly for this to happen in the future. I don’t believe they are aware this “school” thing is something that will be happening every other day for the remainder of the fall into winter. They will find out soon enough. I’m gonna have to figure out what I will do from 9:30 till 12 noon this coming Monday. Does sitting in a dark room, banging my head against a wall count as doing something?

*It was here I had my obligatory weep fest… where did the time go? Weren’t they just born? How are they old enough to be in school? They’re suddenly so big! Who stole my little babies!!! Bla bla bla. The bittersweet mama crying continued off and on for the rest of the day and night. I may be over it, maybe not, maybe never. The next important milestone is for me to be able to focus my attentions on useful things and not have this time when they are occupied three mornings a week wasted solely on cleaning the house and looking for a full-time job. I mean, yes, these things need to happen, I suppose. But I also need to try to figure out who I am after three solid years of being available 24/7 to these small creatures for everything. I don’t think its an empty shell, but I know it isn’t who I was three years ago, either.