Strange Old World

They both passed out. Mimi hit her little green pillow in the living room about two hours ago, and Beenie curled up behind me on the futon in their room about 45 mintues ago. Mimi puts herself down for a nap these days, usually between 1-3, walks into a corner with her bankee and lies down, thumb in mouth. But it is always strange when Beenie naps. She doesn’t really need to on a daily basis like her sister does. It is good for her to, though, sometimes. Shit, it is good for me to nap sometimes, too, I just never do. More often than not I wake up super depressed from a nap, therefore avoiding them like the proverbial plague. I guess it’s not good for me, then, is it?

Finished the first project at my job today. Ended up putting in a little over fifteen hours into the assembling of a small website with a CMS (content management system). I understand that this is a small site, and there weren’t any weird links or modules used, no video or audio or Flash or anything like that. It is good to come back to it with something manageable, since I have been out of this particular kind of web work for over three years now. Butcha know what? It is significantly easier than I remember it being. I am unclear if the CMS I am using has improved over that time away or if being a mother is so difficult and confusing and intense almost twenty-four hours a day, every day, that any job is going to seem easier than the very full-time job I’ve had since birthing these lovely girls a little over three years ago. It is kind of a relief to work with something that doesn’t steal it’s sibling’s blankets or shoes, doesn’t hit it’s sibling or have health or food drama. It is just a tool on a computer that has little quirks, but they are quiet quirks and that’s it. Finish some work, turn off the machine. Nighty nite. As I have said, though, now that I have even less time because of working at a job for someone other than my family, my patience and focus with the girls is greater, which makes me a greater mama (hopefully). I can’t wait to get paid!

I will say, however, that after one day sitting at a desk in the office, and mind you, only for about 4.5 hours, I had a small taste of what offices were like, and think the arrangement of me working from home with occasional time in the office is preferable to being in one all the time. Too many fluorescents make mama’s head hurt. But a day or so per week I can handle, methinks. It is great to be around other alleged grown-ups for some tech speak and think.

Actually, it gives me more drive than ever to try to get a focus back on the other things I fancy doing, like painting and writing and maybe making some fun video projects. Life is short. You know this.

The third and final commissioned painting is going to make its way into the painting studio, hopefully tomorrow at some point. That’ll be the Octopus piece for my new sister-in-law’s cousin’s wedding gift. The wedding was earlier this year. The piece is almost done, but has been sitting at my brother’s place for a few months while I waited for a painting space to arrive. That makes the following list of art to complete:

  1. Octopus painting
  2. Flower painting
  3. Puddle painting

There is the solar/lunar series, but I am trying to do that one at home since it’s water-based paint and I need something I can do from home. Getting to the studio is not always an option por moi.

Have I said how great my daughters are lately? They just blow my little pea brain. Really. Complicated, sensitive thought. Massive attitude and moxy. Great looking. Brilliant. I just love ’em and am so grateful they are in good health and brain. I hope I’m giving them the good job as parent they deserve. I probably am most of the time. Nobody gets a perfect parent. Nobody wants a perfect parent.

Where’d the leaves go?!


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